It obviously doesn't go down very well in the history of my blog that I haven't posted in a fortnight. But for that my apologies to everyone!!
However, this fortnight that I was absconding, I was also consumed with the universe.
So, I know now, that I have quite put out there what a superstitious person I am. I perhaps keep creating events for myself. I keep looking for signs. & I do believe in Fate!!
When there are no answers and so many questions! When there is no explanation for the way things turn out. When events seem more freakish than co-incidences! When what ever you say turns into a prediction. When horoscopes and fortune cookies literally spell out your life!! You're bound to feel astrological, right?
There's something I believe in right now, at this moment. I can't point my finger to it and say this is it. But it exists and it's stirring emotions in me. My life has been entangled with so many, two others especially!! It seems like I am in a film with two parallel tracks. This is not a take at reality or an escapism, it just is!
There perhaps was something that triggered a curse. There is something looming over us right now. There is so much drama. And I like it!! :)
I switched on the television 'cuz I wasn't getting sleep. Those who know me would know I instinctivley switched to MM1. Before Sunset. What are the odds, right? I think once you've watched this movie, it stays with you in a way that can't be erased. Like she says, she doesn't believe in an entity, but in some sort of magic. We might deny it for the rest of time. We might even brush off significant events as minor happenings. We might be eluded by drama. But sometimes you can't escape the uncontrollability of your own situation. There is something, that when you feel, will leave you wanting more. It'll change you in a way that is irreversible.
I've tried really hard to not get into specifics. It's one of my flaws. But here's a thought. If not this, it would be something else. Why we make certain choices that alter our lives, we don't know. Why strangeness and randomness exist, we don't know. But we do know what goes around... comes around. Karma. & what ever you put out in the universe will find a way! :)
Friday, 29 June 2007
Wednesday, 13 June 2007
The Best Days Of My LIfe
Things you won't have time for when you're 20+ and out of college:
Sitting on random chairs in Westside to pass your time.
Complaining of the lecture room you're in. (3rd floor, all the way in the hostel building!)
Buying pink polka dotted umbrellas.
Talking on the phone till sunrise. (You'll always have someone beside you who'll mind it)
Having sleepover marathons.
Having long conversations over notes (pieces of paper passed around) and text conversations.
Making gifts.
Roaming around at 2 in the morning till you find ice-cream.
Whiling away time sitting in the foyer.
Reading into jokes.
Making 10,000 alternate predictions of how your life is going to turn out.
Spending hours converting videos.
Spending so much time on facebook, you know life histories of people that you might not even recognize in the real world.
Fighting over time. (You'll be a culprit yourself)
Dancing for no reason.
Watching all the movies that release every Friday.
Movie marathons. With tubs of popcorn.
Playing board games. Playing with soft toys.
Fighting with your parents over allowance.
Sunday dinners.
Getting out at 5 in the morning for a walk with your friend.
Doing things you felt like.
Time is running by so fast.
I don't even remember when and how I reached here.
But I know these times are not gonna come back.
We're either not going to have a vacation for life or be on a vacation for life.
Either way, the "real world" out there is going to be a tad bit harsh.
So, let's keep smiling and make memories that'll last us forever.
Guys, please feel free to add your own tid-bits of fun! :)
Sitting on random chairs in Westside to pass your time.
Complaining of the lecture room you're in. (3rd floor, all the way in the hostel building!)
Buying pink polka dotted umbrellas.
Talking on the phone till sunrise. (You'll always have someone beside you who'll mind it)
Having sleepover marathons.
Having long conversations over notes (pieces of paper passed around) and text conversations.
Making gifts.
Roaming around at 2 in the morning till you find ice-cream.
Whiling away time sitting in the foyer.
Reading into jokes.
Making 10,000 alternate predictions of how your life is going to turn out.
Spending hours converting videos.
Spending so much time on facebook, you know life histories of people that you might not even recognize in the real world.
Fighting over time. (You'll be a culprit yourself)
Dancing for no reason.
Watching all the movies that release every Friday.
Movie marathons. With tubs of popcorn.
Playing board games. Playing with soft toys.
Fighting with your parents over allowance.
Sunday dinners.
Getting out at 5 in the morning for a walk with your friend.
Doing things you felt like.
Time is running by so fast.
I don't even remember when and how I reached here.
But I know these times are not gonna come back.
We're either not going to have a vacation for life or be on a vacation for life.
Either way, the "real world" out there is going to be a tad bit harsh.
So, let's keep smiling and make memories that'll last us forever.
Guys, please feel free to add your own tid-bits of fun! :)
Sunday, 10 June 2007
Just My Luck
Well, you may think I am a movie buff. You may call me a cinephile. I’ll accept all those titles. For I feel like I am living the movies.
What does this have to do with luck anyway? I know there are co-incidences and superstitions. But there’s also fate. Sometimes certain things happen when they have to in the way they do because they were meant to. & I truly believe in this.
So, the movie got me thinking. Have I had bad luck for too long now? Did I actually manage to exchange my luck with someone? And is there a way of getting it back?
I guess I said it and was thinking about it for so long that freakish co-incidences seem to be unfolding as if they were linked to this.
& it would have been okay if it stopped at that. But it didn’t! The fortune cookies are confirming it. They totally are. “You will lose something and find it again!” Like, really?
It is really naïve but what choice do I have left? I figure out how I lost my luck and to whom. Find an alternate way of getting it back. Believe I’m stuck because I haven’t found the tester. & yet, somehow manage to get my luck back. Thumping my bad luck on someone who goes through something terrible..
Friday, 8 June 2007
Happily Ever After? Happy Ending? Is there an after?
Apart from my previous post and the fact that I am ummm 19, I think I've realised more than anything the value of time!!
They say these are your best years and they'll never come back. These are the experiences that pretty much shape the way you'll think about stuff for the rest of your life. What they forget to tell you though is that you'll suffer tremendous losses. You'll go through a growth pert and lose so much of your hair. Which is fine really. But you'll lose friends. To other friends. To peer pressure. To academics. To disease and death!!!!
We all live in this bubble. You never think someone you know could be HIV+ or have a life-threatening disease. You never think someone you know could be dying - physically or emotionally!! & if and when you find out, you're overcome with shock to react to it!!!
For the past fortnight, I've been visiting a home that shelters HIV+ kids. Some of them so young, they don't even know what they're suffering from. But what is most striking about them is that they have an amazing spirit of living. They take care of each other - they share everything they've got and they live every day as if it's the only one. We might have learnt everything else but I guess we missed out on the most important thing.
Have we become insensitive? Are we selfish? Or do we need hard-hitting facts to show us how small we are - in comparison to the bigger picture! We let petty fights, misunderstandings, rash decisions get in the way. I thought we were bigger than this. The scariest thing is losing someone special. Because it won't matter then, none of this will!
All those times that we have won't come back again. The sleepovers and parties. From walking on the beach to cooking in the kitchen. From foam filled dance floors to board game filled beds. Crazy pictures that fill up albums. Letters that take too much of drawer space. These are the only things that will make us smile. So why not have so many memories that we never have a dull moment? I guess we all need to let go.. Of the past. Of our prejudices.m Of ourselves :)
They say these are your best years and they'll never come back. These are the experiences that pretty much shape the way you'll think about stuff for the rest of your life. What they forget to tell you though is that you'll suffer tremendous losses. You'll go through a growth pert and lose so much of your hair. Which is fine really. But you'll lose friends. To other friends. To peer pressure. To academics. To disease and death!!!!
We all live in this bubble. You never think someone you know could be HIV+ or have a life-threatening disease. You never think someone you know could be dying - physically or emotionally!! & if and when you find out, you're overcome with shock to react to it!!!
For the past fortnight, I've been visiting a home that shelters HIV+ kids. Some of them so young, they don't even know what they're suffering from. But what is most striking about them is that they have an amazing spirit of living. They take care of each other - they share everything they've got and they live every day as if it's the only one. We might have learnt everything else but I guess we missed out on the most important thing.
Have we become insensitive? Are we selfish? Or do we need hard-hitting facts to show us how small we are - in comparison to the bigger picture! We let petty fights, misunderstandings, rash decisions get in the way. I thought we were bigger than this. The scariest thing is losing someone special. Because it won't matter then, none of this will!
All those times that we have won't come back again. The sleepovers and parties. From walking on the beach to cooking in the kitchen. From foam filled dance floors to board game filled beds. Crazy pictures that fill up albums. Letters that take too much of drawer space. These are the only things that will make us smile. So why not have so many memories that we never have a dull moment? I guess we all need to let go.. Of the past. Of our prejudices.m Of ourselves :)
Tuesday, 5 June 2007
My Life Without Me
A lazy Sunday afternoon.. A click of the remote.. MM2 and My Life Without Me
The movie said some very important things about life! It seems our whole life is directed towards keeping away from death. We don't think of it as something that would happen to us. We always want to buy the new clothes and especially those that we'll fit into when we lose weight. We want to eat the good food. But when you know you're going to die it won't matter anymore. You stop thinking, looking at the colours.
Like everyone else who might read this blog, I don't think of myself as someone who is going to die soon. Hell, I've been planning my marriage and kids for the longest time (honest confession).
That didn't stop me from thinking though!! (Yes, it's in my nature!!) I've stopped talkin to some people. For so long now, we've even stopped acknowledging each other's existence. Weren't we rash when we were younger? Aren't we always going to be? The matters of the heart are the most fragile and yet treated with such rigidity. I wonder how we give up on people so easily. I feel like I've been giving up on people my whole life!!
What's written on our tombstone & for those of us who aren't going to have one is going to be the only memory of us when we're gone. It won't matter then why we fought. It won't matter then what we looked like. It won't matter, none of it will. Some of us will have memories. Some of us will try hard to forget them. And the others will wish we'd made some time to make them. But we'll be gone.
May be some things are predestined. May be some things are just fate. May be there are signs flying all over the place. And may be there is something like karma. I don't know. I don't have the answers. But I don't even have the questions. Acceptance! funny word.
I'll leave a letter titled:
Things I didn't say to you - 'cuz may be I didn't want to
Things I'd never say to you - 'cuz may be you didn't want me to
The movie said some very important things about life! It seems our whole life is directed towards keeping away from death. We don't think of it as something that would happen to us. We always want to buy the new clothes and especially those that we'll fit into when we lose weight. We want to eat the good food. But when you know you're going to die it won't matter anymore. You stop thinking, looking at the colours.
Like everyone else who might read this blog, I don't think of myself as someone who is going to die soon. Hell, I've been planning my marriage and kids for the longest time (honest confession).
That didn't stop me from thinking though!! (Yes, it's in my nature!!) I've stopped talkin to some people. For so long now, we've even stopped acknowledging each other's existence. Weren't we rash when we were younger? Aren't we always going to be? The matters of the heart are the most fragile and yet treated with such rigidity. I wonder how we give up on people so easily. I feel like I've been giving up on people my whole life!!
What's written on our tombstone & for those of us who aren't going to have one is going to be the only memory of us when we're gone. It won't matter then why we fought. It won't matter then what we looked like. It won't matter, none of it will. Some of us will have memories. Some of us will try hard to forget them. And the others will wish we'd made some time to make them. But we'll be gone.
May be some things are predestined. May be some things are just fate. May be there are signs flying all over the place. And may be there is something like karma. I don't know. I don't have the answers. But I don't even have the questions. Acceptance! funny word.
I'll leave a letter titled:
Things I didn't say to you - 'cuz may be I didn't want to
Things I'd never say to you - 'cuz may be you didn't want me to
Saturday, 2 June 2007
Memoirs of a good life
Irfan Khan takes the baby Kal Penn away from the shore, into the sea. They've forgotten the camera behind. "How will I remember this day then?" asks the baby. "Well, you'll just have to commit it to memory!", replies Irfan Khan. That was The Namesake.
Well, I don't have any such luck. The only claim I have to fame is that I was named after the "pole star" ;). & that too people manage to mess up.
The good thing about digital cameras is that they let you capture memories when ever you want them. & you can revisit them in a span of a half hour of having created them!! :)
So, do we spend time making our memories "picture perfect"? Are the notorious events an imposter for the lens? Of course, we wish we could record all those happy moments and watch them as often as we watch F.R.I.E.N.D.S reruns! But alas, that ain't possible.
My teacher once said, "there's so much to say and such little time". However, there's so much space and such few words. One insuperable way of commiting to memory is writing. It's a log of what you felt in a picturesque way. & the pictures are in the eyes of the interpreter. It's a shame most of us don't practice this.
Coming to the point though, I'd like to share with the web one of my most amazing experiences. An early morning, an urgent call, a hasty rickshaw ride and really comfortable recliners. A song, the curse of a woman and really brilliant graphics. Lots of confusion, cheap rates and discounts. Almost sitting in a stranger's lap, cracking the code and drooling over hot men. Watching Pirates of the Caribbean : At World's End at 9 in the morning!!! Brilliance!!!
Having chocolate and chocolate sprinkled donuts. Stupid kids, adult jokes, tubs of popcorn. Laughing out loud, fairy tales, crossover of Gandalf & Dumbledore. Wishing for food while standing for the national anthem, holding a "counted plate" of donuts throughout the movie & still hoping for popcorn. Watching Shrek 3 at 12:30. Did I mention right after Pirates???
Rushing to McDonald's to grab the happy meal, breaking a slipper, picking up a dress. Hustling, sweating, tearing, eating, fixing. "I'm an ogre.. Burp.. I'm on it!" Cheese, Mayonnaise, lettuce!
Meeting school friends over a cup of coffee. The rain... the weather... the drops of water :)
I guess sometimes you just have to commit some things to memory. Or words to paper!
Well, I don't have any such luck. The only claim I have to fame is that I was named after the "pole star" ;). & that too people manage to mess up.
The good thing about digital cameras is that they let you capture memories when ever you want them. & you can revisit them in a span of a half hour of having created them!! :)
So, do we spend time making our memories "picture perfect"? Are the notorious events an imposter for the lens? Of course, we wish we could record all those happy moments and watch them as often as we watch F.R.I.E.N.D.S reruns! But alas, that ain't possible.
My teacher once said, "there's so much to say and such little time". However, there's so much space and such few words. One insuperable way of commiting to memory is writing. It's a log of what you felt in a picturesque way. & the pictures are in the eyes of the interpreter. It's a shame most of us don't practice this.
Coming to the point though, I'd like to share with the web one of my most amazing experiences. An early morning, an urgent call, a hasty rickshaw ride and really comfortable recliners. A song, the curse of a woman and really brilliant graphics. Lots of confusion, cheap rates and discounts. Almost sitting in a stranger's lap, cracking the code and drooling over hot men. Watching Pirates of the Caribbean : At World's End at 9 in the morning!!! Brilliance!!!
Having chocolate and chocolate sprinkled donuts. Stupid kids, adult jokes, tubs of popcorn. Laughing out loud, fairy tales, crossover of Gandalf & Dumbledore. Wishing for food while standing for the national anthem, holding a "counted plate" of donuts throughout the movie & still hoping for popcorn. Watching Shrek 3 at 12:30. Did I mention right after Pirates???
Rushing to McDonald's to grab the happy meal, breaking a slipper, picking up a dress. Hustling, sweating, tearing, eating, fixing. "I'm an ogre.. Burp.. I'm on it!" Cheese, Mayonnaise, lettuce!
Meeting school friends over a cup of coffee. The rain... the weather... the drops of water :)
I guess sometimes you just have to commit some things to memory. Or words to paper!
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